Letting Go of Resistance + Accepting What Is

Image: @thekindset

Acceptance of things (and people) as they are is an important spiritual teaching. However it was one I admittedly glossed over and dismissed for a long time.

Maybe because it sounded too simple.

Or because it subconsciously evoked in me an association with giving up or not trying.

But recently in the midst of strong emotional resistance, I had a moment of clarity about exactly why acceptance is important if we want to move forward.

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Unless we can accept things as they are RIGHT NOW we stay stuck in the energy of resistance.

The resistance will typically manifest as a mental loop of regret, dissatisfaction, self-blame or denial.

We can recognise this through thoughts such as:

• ‘I wish things were happening faster’

• ‘If only I had done things differently…’

• ‘I should be further ahead’

• ‘Things were so much better before’

• ‘It’s not fair’

These thoughts are our brain’s misguided way of trying to solve the ‘problem’ we are experiencing.

But they don’t actually do anything to change or improve our situation; and as we know, only make us feel worse.

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So, if we want to actually do something constructive and self-loving we need to start by acknowledging where we’re at WITHOUT attaching a mental narrative to it.

It simply is.

How long can we be with that without having a resistant thought? Try it.

From there we can turn our attention to how we are being blessed in this moment.

This is not about forcing ourselves to write a gratitude list. Rather it’s about drawing our attention to where life IS giving to us and supporting us.

FOR EXAMPLE

Maybe we are simple being blessed right now by the fresh air that we are able to breathe in fully with our lungs (after all, how may people are not able to do this?)

How long can we take that in and appreciate it, without defaulting to our resistant thoughts? I invite you to try this.

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When I did this myself I felt how the energy of resistance started to dissipate in me.

The sense of wanting to control, fix and compare gave way to a feel of calm and okay-ness.

I thought accepting things as they were was defeat. But instead I found it neutralised persistent negative thoughts and connected me back to my inner peace.

It’s something I intend to keep cultivating and coming back to. I hope you will too!

— Kat